If, as a child you had no mummy to share your concerns and worries with, then you are likely to have glitches in your coping techniques. But, on the flip-side, because as a kid- you had to solve your own problems; then albeit hidden under brain dust: you still have this own grown ability to do so now!

We abused kids are very wise- in some ways, always remember so!

As a child for instance, my mother would frequently sneak me out of bed, whilst my younger siblings slept on. I was lured by the promise of being allowed to watch The Professionals, with handfuls of sweets. But we seldom did, since really, I was called upon: to off- load with.

At six years old- as the tears ran on and tissues got plucked: I had no clue how to help her. I couldn’t fidget because I’d have got told off, and kept hoping she’d scoff faster ‘coz I was so tired.

Over again I kept telling her my ideas. But in retrospect, I realise my efforts would always be futile. Such are the complexities of my mother’s personality. The type that would exist on a diet of boiled greens with marmite; who understandingly would fail after three days, and wonder why she was gaining weight- when she grazed, nightly, on carrier bags of confectionery…

I may have been young, but as my grandmother was a retired diabetic nurse: I knew what mother was doing was wrong…but you could advise her of nothing. She, has never once, sought to engage with, notice, or be able to solve a concern or worry that I have ever had.

Therefore, since I’m sure my advice back then to her was constructive, and I was already aware of her machinations: I learned how to deal with my own problems.

Because I knew I was right, and grew the useful art of lip service: “Okay mummy, that’s a good idea, just start again tomorrow.” I’d eventually be allowed back to bed; when by, lots of air would blow- out of my mouth, and then I’d stare at my pink elephant, that daddy bought me, and think: why can’t mummy see that she’s making her own problems.

And then, because when I was allowed to see my daddy, he always made me squeeze my Weak Hand with his: I would pretend to do so under the covers, and put mother’s problems away into an imaginary pocket. I basically slept on them, knowing innately, that I’d feel better after some sleep…

I still use this technique today. It means, along with meditation, I can sleep, and in reduced pain. When we are asleep, our brain does amazing things. It kickstarts our subconscious minds and in so, we make sense of our problems. We categorise them, and partially solve them and we have a clearer sense of how to deal or delegate them: – so many being out of our control. This, we only realise, with a fresh head, the next day.

So, do not let your problems over-ride your sensibility, and feel free to copy my own-grown technique.

Pop your problems in your imaginary pockets tonight, and feel in improved control tomorrow!

I hope this helps.

With SUNNY wishes,

Emma x