I’m giving you permission to take care of you!

For some people, doing so is second nature, because it’s a learned skill that nurturing parents do for their children. For example: a child with a fever will be tucked into bed with a drink, perhaps with some comforting television and appropriate medication. When that child becomes an adult then they’ll know the right way to help recover from a fever.

But, if you were raised in an unstable, traumatic environment, then taking care of yourself can be challenging. Historically you may have had to hide your symptoms purely for fear of re-percussions. And if you suffer with PTSD then this in itself can cause much “white space” in your head, as you are still trying to process the things that happened to you. This, in my experience, can take many years.

In short, taking care of number one can feel self-indulgent if you were raised in an environment where that wasn’t the norm.

Yet, and especially with the NHS being under strain, it’s so important to take care of ourselves. Start with the small matters, such as remembering to drink a pint or glass of water the moment you get out of bed. There are many health benefits in doing this, and there are so many other small steps you can take to improving your health and wellbeing.

Then, start being kind to yourself – change any negative narrative to phrases that are nourishing, such as: “I’ve done well to survive and I deserve to be happy”. I find repeating positive affirmations really helpful and I like to do these in front of a mirror.

Lastly, remember that each and every one of us deserves to be happy, and learning to take care of number one is an integral starting point. Good luck.