Last week I recommended for you to get to know yourselves better before setting unrealistic goals in the year ahead: Prepping, if you like. This is because, for those of us who’ve endured trauma, it can feel as though we have a frozen brain. In my experience it can take decades to thaw - years [...]
As we start a New Year, I recommend that you don’t give yourself unrealistic goals and resolutions - I think that it’s far more important to get to know yourself better. You may find it surprising, but many people that I speak to, even reaching retirement age, don’t feel as though they know themselves… When [...]
The conscious mind is: “I’m just going upstairs to put the clothes away.” The sub-conscious mind is: “Huh, those clothes are annoying me there, better sort them out soon”. The problem with the sub-conscious mind is that it’s embedded somewhere in our thoughts. It doesn’t get heard by anyone except yourself, and your critical inner [...]
If depression is like a black sky, then those of us who endure it know how it feels when the sky lightens slightly. But what can we do to help broaden those moments of light? How can we help to keep ourselves feeling more upbeat? Here are some things that I do: 1: Be realistic, [...]
Do you suffer from what I call “Race Syndrome?” Have you wondered why it feels as though you are competing in a race? Well this happened to me, and no matter how unimportant the daily task, I felt as though I had to steam through it as though I was a sole athlete in an [...]
Have you ever regretted saying something that you don’t mean? I certainly have, and if I’m honest, I still do. But, when this happens, I’ve learnt to apologise as quickly as possible … This is because, when my daughter was at school, I said one too many, unkind things to her. They were not helpful [...]
Have you ever wondered why bad things that happened in your childhood, are hurting your life today? When I saw the above quote, and only recently, it certainly grabbed my attention. Anna Runkle of www.thecrappychildhoodfairy.com talks about new research on CPTSD (childhood post-traumatic stress disorder – carried out by Harvard University) and she says that, [...]
Trying to consciously do positive things for yourself will help you to feel good. It could be going for a walk, baking a cake, or perhaps you might enrol on a course that interests you. For me, it’s my writing. When you engage in activities that you enjoy, you will notice a positive change in [...]
To give ourselves praise for the things we achieve is neither arrogant nor conceited. It’s actually the ideal way to help us feel better about ourselves. It’s a deserved tonic for when we do things well, however simple - like if we notice an improvement on something like a poor eating habit, or an increase [...]
Trauma is like an icy chill and the more you endure it, the more likely you will feel numb. The trouble with numb is that it leads to functioning on autopilot; we forget to think about many tasks and go about our daily activities like robots. We move away from constructive or positive thoughts and [...]